Published October 26, 2016 by EMMANUELLA ODUM


Hi Readers !!! its THE AMAZON again and oh yes , i have missed you all. Hope the Recession hasn’t been biting too hard??? if it has, today’s post promises to lift your spirits a bit . Now in response to all your persistent requests for a funny post for a change , here’s a really hilarious piece from our guest blogger the brilliant  FEMI OJOSU !

I’m sure You all know  those annoying people we meet in our everyday day life that seem to think they are all knowing and powerful? Yes , well today’s post is all about them …and if you dont get the joke you’re probably one of them !!!!  Enjoy reading and dont forget to drop comments . Always remember , my amazing quill loves you *winks*



Today, I want to talk about “gods”. Not just any random kind of god, but small humans who think themselves as  gods.

By gods or ancient deities, you may imagine the endless stories we were told of Eshu, Sango, Thor, Amadioha, etc. However when I say ‘gods’ … I’ll give you examples… That’s the point of this treatise afterall.  Well, here’s my beginning.

I first encountered these small tiny busy little ‘gods’; at least to the best of my memory at igbobi College. Those small ‘gods’ who lorded over your entire existence just because they bore the moniker of senior. Hmm… The hell I saw in my first week at boarding house! There were small gods who punished me simply because my brother was a small god😑; I suffered no be small. Until I became a small god myself …!  Food and dining prefect extraordinaire, no be beans; my word was Law. The tyrants we were though…

I encountered my next set of small ‘gods’ at Afe Babalola University… Fiercest amongst whom was “She”; She Who Must Not Be Named. As a Law Student at Abuad, the fear of “She” was the beginning of wisdom. For her, it was hundred percent or nothing. You were either a ‘Law Student’ or you were not. There was no middle ground.

Then came Feli… No, I will not mention names; God bless her good soul. She was the first line of defense against erring law students. If you fail to comply with college regulations , this woman would hunt you down Mossad style! Even the DSS had nothing on her!

Then we had the Red guards and the Porters . I will not even say anything about them. Documenting their misdeeds deeds is not worth the effort.

At this point, you should’ve noticed that there’s a progressive pattern to this; so it’s natural that my next case study be The Nigerian Law School.


Ah… The ‘gods’ of The NLS, starting from day one, we had quite a number of them. The woman sharing tags, the man giving out yellow forms, the ID card man… Now, those were small ‘gods’!

But of particular importance, were the ‘gods’ in charge of clocking in and clocking out (monitoring the electronic attendance register). I will not mention names, we know them and better still, they know themselves.


Now, the ‘gods’ of the cocktail party, where are you? The gods that would hoard small chops until it gets spoilt before they start sharing.


And that is how I was about to forget the greatest of the Law school gods… Imbued with the spirit of the Angel of bar finals… ‘drumroll please’😂😂😂



And then for the ‘god’ that gave birth to this treatise in the first place, the latest in a long list of small gods I’ve encountered over the years, I give to you …

ama *eerie nollywood music playing in the background *…THE AMAZON


Errm Errm…  Sorry for the break in transmission… I seem to have run out of words to type so… I’ll leave you to conclude this piece by telling me about the small ‘gods’ you’ve encountered. Oya start commenting below else you’re one of them gods!!!!





4 comments on “SMALL BUSY “APROKO” gods…!

  • The ‘gods’ in my university that frustrated the hell out of me during clearance!!! Ps: NLS ‘gods’have nothing on these ones.
    Their ‘godness’ is on another level! Once i entered an office to have a form signed, on a beautiful and sunny monday afternoon, the ‘god’ in skirt looked up from the desk where she was sleeping away the recession, and screamed that i should get out and close the door behind me!!!

    I was befuddled to say the least😂😂

  • I totally agree on the gods of clocking out at The NLS, they were first class tyrants. oooh, gods of elder sisters, who would ask me to raise my hand and ask “se oro ku” (talk remain?) before I could comment on any conversation they were into.

  • Leave a Reply

    Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

    You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

    Google+ photo

    You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

    Twitter picture

    You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

    Facebook photo

    You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


    Connecting to %s

    %d bloggers like this: